How to Stop a Bully Article in Daily Beast

There is a three part series in the Daily Beast today on Bullying by Lucinda Franks. An interesting read. The topic is really rising to the fore of consciousness of our country. Many states Florida, Rhode Island, Virginia, etc. are taking the issue very seriously and have passed legislation. The mothers of bullied children have grouped together and are becoming a powerful lobby similar to how they did so with MADD, mothers against drunk driving.

Also interesting is some of the backlash against these measures and proposed statutes- the level of insensitivity by some community members is disheartening.

How to Stop a Bully

Ronny Turiaf is a Role Model

This is a blog on internet safety and reputation management, but I had to write a short post about Ronny Turiaf and something he did last night in the New York Knicks game. In the fourth quarter, of a very close game between the Knicks and the Charlotte Bobcats, Turiaf grabbed a rebound in traffic, and inadvertently elbowed a Bobcat player in the process. Turiaf threw the ball to his teammate, and then looked down at the Bobcat player who was still on the ground as everyone else was running up the court quickly to the other end.

You could literally see what was going through Turiaf's mind as he hesitated, "Should I run to the other end with everyone else, or make sure this guy is OK and help him up?" In a pickup game, decency dictates that one help the guy up as there is no real competition, nothing is at stake. In the fourth quarter of a professional game, book is to run to the other end, gain the offensive advantage of 5 against 4, and see the guy after the game. That is obviously what Michael Jordan or Kobe Bryant would do in the same circumstance.

Turiaf's humanity won out. It's almost like he tried to turn away, but he could not. After a moment's hesitation in which his shoulder started moving toward the other end of the court, he quickly turned back, gave the fallen player a hand up and ran back to the other end. I did not see Mike D'Antoni's reaction (the Knick's coach), but the announcers were saying he was not pleased with Turiaf.

But in that moment, my respect and appreciation for Turiaf soared. I already suspected that I really liked Turiaf. His hustle, team oriented play and how how he does the little things have been a real pleasure to watch in the young season. His actions were exactly how I would want my kids to act in that situation. Competition is important, but too often it seems to take a back seat to our decency.

I don't think there is YouTube video of this play, but here is a nice post that highlights the value of Turiaf to the Knicks team: Ronny Turiaf

Parents Concerned About Cyberbullying

There were some very interesting numbers embedded in the recent article below on Care.com. It discussed how many parents are very concerned about monitoring their kids on social networks. One of the more interesting numbers was that 75% of parents monitor their kids' pages on social networks. This is the good news. My instinct tells me that most of these 75% are performing this task using an occasional manual method instead of a consistent 'always-on' automated approach such as YouDiligence. See the article.

Catfish and Naive Social Network Behavior

Saw the movie "Catfish" last night which is purportedly based on true events. That controversy aside, it was interesting to see supposed sophisticated social network participants experience 'eye-opening' events.

It reinforces that even the most experienced social networkers are capable of being fooled. If people like this are fooled, what chance do our young teens stand on the networks?

Sporting News: Saving Schools from Social Media Catastrophes

In the wake of the Fox News channel segment on UDiligence, Chris Littmann of the Sporting News blog wrote about our service. Mr. Littmann keyed in on the core value proposition of how UDiligence helps Universities protect their Reputation. He comments about how the public service we provide might not be exactly how some old-school administrators wish to spend part of their budget, but how in the long run it is probably a wise investment.

His piece captures and balances both the value of UDiligence and the perils that await the Reputations of Universities who ignore the wild side of social networking.

Founder on Fox News

Kevin Long, the YouDiligence founder, made an appearance on Fox News today. Fox News was following up on another story done by the Daily Missourian regarding our work with the University of Missouri Tigers football team.

A lot of the points Kevin makes in the Fox segment about how we help student athletes applies to our work helping parents with kids active on social networks. Check out the news segment here:

Inspiration from Madeleine and Anna Quindlan

One never knows where inspiration is going to come from. I got some from an unusual source the other night: an essay on the Madeleine children book series, "Mad about Madeleine", written by Anna Quindlen (which I have not been able to find published on the web in a cursory search).

But toward the end of the essay, Ms. Quindlen writes the line, "Children prize both security and adventure, both bad behavior and conformity, both connections and independence." To me, this is a perfect encapsulation of childhood, and especially the journey through the tweens and teenage years toward adulthood and independence.

From the outside, I am sure I was perceived as adventuresome, independent, non-conformist and a bit of a troublemaker. But this is not the real story. The real story involved a real daily tension between all the opposites listed in Ms.Quindlen's lines. I had a real pull toward security, conformity and connections on a daily basis, and I am sure my journey was more the rule than the exception.

This idea mirrors the concept of all of us having a nature half monster and half angel. And this nature is why YouDiligence is important for parents. Even the best behaved kids will have episodes where they are pulled off their good behavior axis. In other words, good kids have a daily struggle being good--it is hard to be good all the time.

The YouDiligence platform recognizes this daily struggle. YouDiligence platform also recognizes that independence is very important to all kids. We designed YouDiligence explicitly to respect this fact, and to try to create a platform that could simultaneously respect kids' privacy and give parents the peace of mind in knowing that their kids have a safety net for those times when the kids are not behaving as appropriately or safely as parents would hope,